Keys To A Successful Marriage

These seven keys come from Oral Roberts book entitled, “Still Doing The Impossible”.

  1. Let God lead you to your helpmate.
  2. Be Married for life.
  3. Opposite Temperament is an integral part of a successful marriage.
  4. Practicing a Good Sex Life.
  5. Read the Bible and Pray together.
  6. Integrity of Life and action
  7. Morals and Christian Behavior.

Key 1: Let God Lead You To Your Helpmate

Never move toward one another on your own, but rather wait until you know that God’s hand is moving you together. He will move you together in ways that will remove all doubt. Never stop trusting God for you helpmate. Many times we try to help God and choose the wrong helpmate, don’t get overly anxious, wait upon the Lord.

Key 2: Be Married for Life

There must never be any thought that if some serious trials come up, you would part. What God joins together let no man separate. Be sure that you are both Baptised according to First Corinthians 6:19-20, the Holy Spirit will make your bodies His temple. Remember that you have been purchased at a great price (Christ Shed Blood). That will make a great difference, you literally are not your own. You are the property of God, He has become your covering for life. Prayer together in the Holy Ghost and with understanding as Paul taught and practiced (I Cor. 14:1-3, 13-15; Ephesians. 6:18).

Key 3: Opposite Temperament is an integral part of a successful marriage.

Have you heard the saying, Iron sharpens Iron? This is a true saying! There are those who are very organized, thrifty, work motivated, and most of all; of a steady temperament. They are not easily upset or angered and bear a lot before they reach the end of their endurance level.

Then there are those who are those who are quite the opposite, they are quick tempered and quite combustible. They say things without thinking and often bring harm for which they must apologize and try to make it right. The two opposites will bring balance to the marriage and relationships.

Key 4: Practicing a Good Sex Life.

A good sex life will bring you far more closely together in your spiritual development than you can realize. The first thing God said to Man was, “Be fruitful and multiply….” (Genesis. 1:28). After the flood destroyed the human race and only Noah and his family remained. God said to Noah, “Be fruitful and multiply……” (Genesis 9:1). The marriage act is more than for the procreation of the human race. This act is also for the continual  enjoyment of life and physical release.

In the study of the Bible, sex for procreation leaves a person incomplete or half a person. Both male and female are created with unlimited ability-and desire- to bring themselves into being one person sexually. Take that away from the marriage, and the couple robs themselves of the very necessary physical and emotional release that God created them to have on a continuing basis.

Therefore, married couples should understand this and not feel inhibited in the marriage act on a mutually worked out basis that completes them both. In First Corinthians 7:1-5 an explanation of the natural function of husband and wife is given by the apostle Paul.

1NOW AS to the matters of which you wrote me. It is well [and by that I mean advantageous, expedient, profitable, and wholesome] for a man not to touch a woman [to cohabit with her] but to remain unmarried. 2But because of the temptation to impurity and to avoid immorality, let each [man] have his own wife and let each [woman] have her own husband.  3The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights (goodwill, kindness, and what is due her as his wife), and likewise the wife to her husband. 4For the wife does not have [exclusive] authority and control over her own body, but the husband [has his rights]; likewise also the husband does not have [exclusive] authority and control over his body, but the wife [has her rights]. 5Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other [of your due marital rights], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [to sin] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire.                                                                                 Amplified Bible

 

Carefully notice these points from the Word Of God:

  • The best way to avoid fornication (and adultery) is a good marriage.
  • Benevolence (kindly understanding) is to be practiced between husband and wife in the marriage act.
  • Withholding the marriage act from one another is defrauding each other. It’s both wrong and incompatible with a scriptural married life, except for a mutually agreed on a period for fasting and prayer (doing this together), and then resuming the harmonious marriage act together again. This is the most important reason: to prevent Satan from tempting either or both to be drawn sexually to someone outside of their marriage.

Men are much more prone to this than women because men are the givers and women are the receivers. If the women are not willing to receive from their mate, the man will find someone else. Women don’t use the marriage act as a form of punishment, but rather workout your differences. Men, control yourself and refrain from forcing yourself against her will. This is one of the main reasons for the termination of the marriage covenant next to financial burdens.

The marriage is not solely based on the marriage act, but rather of the affection which leads up to the marriage act. Women are receivers and need to be loved, they are the recipients of love. Men, on the other hand, are givers, they need to express their affection and also need to feel that it has been received by the receiver. During these periods of open affection the entire family benefits. The children feel secure, the relationship is strengthened and there is harmony in the household.

Complement on another during these periods of affection, without it, you will feel incomplete.

Key 5: Read the Bible and Pray together.

This key will help bind you both together. Read and study the Word of God together, because men and women have been created differently; we each have different insights from the Word of God. Women are much more sensitive to the voice of God than men. Men are much more able to be doers of the Word than women due to the fact that they aren’t as emotional as women. It is the man which must lead the family toward the things of God, not the women. Men need to spend more time in the presence of God because of their contact in the world. They are polluted through work, business, and work related  relationships. Men where created to have face-to-face experiences with God daily, not just on Sundays.

Key 6: Integrity Of Life and Action In The Marriage Covenant

The Bible says, Owe no man anything! My constant advice to ministers and those not in ministry is “STAY OUT OF DEBT” — in your marriage and your ministry. If you are a Born-Again Believer, you are in ministry according to Matthew 28:19-20; therefore, this applies to every believer.

God has given you the faith necessary to live by faith (see Hab. 2:4, Rom. 1:17) in His Word. Keep the promise you made with the credit card companies, pay your bills. Use extra care in the use of credit cards, stay out of debt. We have one credit card and are cautious about spending more than we have in the bank. If you are in debt make a plan of action to get out of debt. Ask the Lord for the necessary Wisdom needed to get out of debt according to James 1:5.

Key 7: Morals and Christian Behavior….

might be the most serious part of a marriage or relationship. If you have a tendency toward a certain weakness (realize that we all have some form of weakness as a result of the fall of man and the curse of sin on man and the earth), we must honestly recognize and face that weakness. Instead of having the attitude of, “I was born with this, and there’s nothing I can do about it.” Yes you can, you can face it …….

  • with utter dependence on God
  • with our will and purpose
  • with prayer and faith
  • with the right kind of pride which Joseph in the Old Covenant had.

For example: when Joseph refused the invitation of Potiphar’s wife in Egypt to commit adultery with her, he said, “I will not sin against God by doing this,” and instead fled despite her false accusations toward him (Genesis 39:7-15).

The Apostle Peter tells us, be you bee sober, be vigilant; because of your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about seeking whom he may devour (1 Peter 5:8).

You must conclude that divorce or separation is not an option, with the exception of unfaithfulness, and physical- mental abuse. Learn to depend on God as your source to work things out in you and for you. Then you will have a truly successful marriage or relationship. Not only yoube blessedd, you and your children will bless others because of your witness for the Lord.

Marriage and family are our most precious gifts. Here’s our slogan: It can be done……….

 

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